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Famous People » jeff foxworthy

Jeff Foxworthy

  • If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • It's hard to think of yourself as a loser at 2 years old.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • Little girls love dolls. They just don't love doll clothes. We've got four thousand dolls and ain't one of them got a stitch of clothes on.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do this.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking my kids to school.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • Pride is the first step in people unraveling and companies unraveling and relationships unraveling.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • The designated driver program, it's not a desirable job. But if you ever get sucked into doing it, drop them off at the wrong house.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He's got a little bit of a Barney Fife quality to him.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • The problem with the designated driver program, it's not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it. At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.
    Jeff Foxworthy
  • There's no down time any more.
    Jeff Foxworthy

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